Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Seoul part 3...another fresh start landing

     The initial sentence of any piece of writing is incredibley daunting, how do I tease people in, convince them to continue with my sentences. Hell, how do I convince myself that I'm writing something substantial? I spend more time trying to find a good breaking sentence then organizing a standardized flow. I know what I will say and write, certain metaphors I pinned as perfect parallels to my observations, powerful key sentences that will secure my creations...but it's that first sentence that makes me stagger.
     It's not just with written work, but conversations, the first meetings, those impressions. I've been going to a bunch of job interviews lately, and found myself understanding that I'm "always" involved in a job interview, I have at least one everyday.
     "I'm applying to be a friend, an aqcuitance, a date, a potential, a customer, an associate, etc etc etc." In many ways, people, and I admit I, am in ways selling myself, promoting that "I am worthy of being involved in your life!" Objective: See if I want to be a part of your life. Whether it be positive life, career, partnership, etc.
     There are so many dating sites...really there's one underlying purpose...curiosity. Whether something serious comes out of it, who knows..but I stumbled upon a quiz question:

     "What makes you more nervous? A: a promising first date or B: A job interview"

     To me...they seem more similar than different. There's the introduction, the mental snuggling and reflection of "Will this person/company/place/life fit and coincide with mine? Will I be happier with this engagement? Should I follow through..or keep applying elsewhere?" They're both pretty involved. Leaving you vulnerable and inevitabley unsure of exact result...or conclusion. 
     There's the vulnerability that gets you to go out there and try out...and maybe you get the part/job/role. But, there of course is the rejection side, leaving you more vulnerable and wandering away ears running by your feet as your tail lifelessly swinging between your thighs.
      Everyone can relate to this. Picturing yourself alongside that person/company. what have you, you REALLY want the job...but you're not a "good fit", they have their eyes on another applicant, your credentials don't match, etc etc etc~rejection. Even if it's out of kindness or a genuine backing, it leaves you bruised and hurt. Not because that person physically harmed you, but because you are let down, you're hopes got ahead of you. Which of course isn't a negative...life.
     Leading me to new starts. All the past stuff, let downs and disapointments, they stung, they stabbed and twisted, but the new starts, the butterflies and excitement and genuine eagerness of the fresh beginning can oversome that crushing...allowance and openess are necessary though. The nausea and nerves are just the butterflies, it's good to be overwhelmed, especially in instances of infinite question marks.

B: A job interview

even if I'm always having them....they're just as daunting as that first sentence.

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